


can we fast-forward 'til you go down on me?

by BigBadWolfram



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack, F/M, Friendship, M/M, Science Stuff, Stormpilot, Youtuber AU, possible Reylo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-05-28 21:48:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6346645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigBadWolfram/pseuds/BigBadWolfram
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"So then Finn just says 'Oh, is this yours?' and he - totally the gentleman - smiles and says 'No more. It is yours now'... How they say in tumblr? I CAN'T EVEN"</p><p>Youtuber-College-AU. Cliché over cliché, I know. </p><p>Totally stolen the title from Panic! at the disco.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Firsts videos are always awkward

“Hello, name is Rey.” A pretty girl winks to the camera. Few seconds later the 1000 watts smile fades.  
“…”  
“Can I try again?”  
*muffled sounds, a cat meowls in the background*  
“Hello, unknown friend who will probably comment something crude like “show your tits, biotch!” or just will comment “who is watching this while eating a banana?”.” She gives the camera a thumbs up and smiles again.  
“…”  
“People really do this?”  
*muffled sounds*  
“Oh. Well, anonymous person, I am here in this messy – and trust me innocent viewer – smelly room to present the project my friend Finn and I are entitled to.”  
Camera swifts to a good-looking black man who smiles shyly.  
“Without our desire. We’re hoping that we could get a podcast but we don’t have any luck.“  
“Say hi, Finn! Internet will be seeing your face and judging.” The girl comes back to the video and wave. “Don’t point that thing to my face!” She laughs and her laughter sounds like a dying horse and then more laughter.  
“Well, our project is to post videos regularly about science stuff-”  
“Nice term. No one would guess that you are an astrophysics major.”  
“Shut up! Or I will show them the poetry you wrote about-”  
*the video abruptly ends*

Professor Leia Organa inclines in her chair and laughs. She makes a mental note to thank her teacher assistant, Poe, for such brilliant idea. 

Poe Dameron wipes the tears from his face. Those two are hilarious.


	2. About crushes

Rey waves with a winning smile.  
“Hi, everyone! I guess Finn and I never told why we are doing this for real – Yes, Huxley-Dick – And I am hoping that you are saying the authors Huxley and Dick not Huxley’s Dick -, we've read your comment…”  
“And now you are antagonizing the only comment we’ve got!” – Finn says rolling his eyes.  
“Oh, shut up. Is just a pun!” Then she squares her shoulders and continues with a professional voice “So, this is our project for Scientific Divulgation class. And we want to explain science which everyone can understand.” Finn appears behind Rey and them high five yelling “Science Bros!” and Finn cries “I am Iron Man!” and Rey smirks and forces Finn to sit down beside her.  
“…”  
“It’s your time, Finn.” Rey says through her teeth.  
“Oh, right! Hi, my name is Finn and I’m studying mathematics – well, in fact, I am a mathematical biologist and yes it is a real form of science and we kind of use mathematics to study biology topics such as epidemiology or…”  
“Just like Plague Inc!” pipes Rey and Finn rolls his eyes.  
“We can’t let this go.”  
“You are the one whom told to you-know-who this when he asked!”  
“Yeah, because I am the one whom is in the same lab than Lord Voldemort himself!”  
“Oy! That is unfair! So, I already told you my name and I am studying astrophysics and I really like the space…”  
“She is a Star Trek nerd, everyone, and not because Chris Pine’s fine piece of arse… ”  
“Our professor is going to see this video and you are speaking of Chris Pine’s arse – not that’s untrue, really. – but can you imagine the proper and refined Professor Organa hearing this without getting baffled?”  
“You totally have a girl crush on Professor Organa.” Finn says as Rey gets redder and redder.  
“And you have a man crush on her teacher assistant!” Rey cries.  
“And you have a ‘fuck-me-now’ crush on her –“ Finn can’t finalize his sentence because Rey throws herself at him.  
*fight sounds. Finn shrieks and a cat meows*  
*Rey returns looking askew*  
“We’re going to explain science next video and you can suggest a theme in the comments box!” 

“Luke, I think your student is a little bit crazy.” Says Professor Organa on the phone. “Just watch her videos! Oh, are you watching right now? You think it is hilarious that I am a proper and refined woman. What is this sound? Oh. No, tell Ben that I would like to have tea with him sometime. We can discuss some crushes. On both sides. ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've tried. I swear.


	3. Star Stuff and why Science is Damn Fun!

“Hello, dear viewers! You were so kind - well, not Huxley-Dick who kept writing really mean comments! You kiss your mum with this mouth, young man? ...”  
“Well, he doesn’t really need his mouth to be crude on the internet, Rey, so he can kiss his mum after, I think”  
“You don’t have any sense of humour, Finn.”  
“And you are liking antagonize this innocent - and rude - viewer just because his name remembers you a certain man...” Finn is smiling deviously.  
“Shut up!” Rey blushes. “Our first theme is astronomy and we will tell you, two subscribers - Hi, Professor Organa! Hi, Kylo-Ren! - whomever you are - a little bit about stars, composition, distance - some that already exploded but we can see its light for sometime...”  
“Tell me that you are gonna tell them that if the sun explodes right now we have kind of 8 minutes before we die.”  
“Theoretical biologist typical. If doesn’t end in death he really doesn’t care.”  
“Oy!”  
“Well, a star is nothing more than a giant ball of hot gas that creates and emits its own radiation through nuclear fusion... Kind of reminds me my first boss that man could make hot gas like a pro.”  
“Rey, digression. Remember what your dear future mother-in-law told us.”  
“What? He is kidding, professor Organa! I don’t have nothing with your son!” Rey tries to suffocate Finn with her hands. Finn is getting blue. “Oh, well, digression. We can have various forms of stars: for example, yellow stars, blue stars, red dwarf star, giant stars... A star is composed of hydrogen and helium mostly... So when someone tells you that you are made of star stuff, remember they are telling you that you are mostly gas. So romantic!”  
“Oh, the nearest star to the sun is Alpha Centauri, who is in fact are three stars. What else?”  
“Supernovas?”  
“You only like supernovas because of Doctor Who! He cries every time the Tenth Doctor tells Rose ‘I’m burning up a sun just to say goodbye’...”  
“Lies! All lies! Don’t listen her, viewers!”  
“Well, a supernova is when a star explodes and outshines its galaxy for a time. For all I know the latest is the Kepler’s Supernova... Well, observed in Milky Way.”  
“And?”  
“Oh! And the most brightest supernova was in 1006 AD - I know, how do we know? For older texts and fables.”  
“Can you explain them something that I can understand? Something like the Kepler’s Equation.”  
“You only know that because is an example in analysis... Kepler’s Equation gives us the relation between the polar coordinates - and I really think you should explain polar coordinates - of a planet, star, you name it”  
“Some people’s egos” Finn says with a cheeky grin.  
“and the time elapsed from a initial point. That’s what we use to determine orbits of satellites for example. Then, we can also define a Kepler orbit who is nothing more than orbital motion as an ellipse, parabola or hyperbola.”  
“Boring! Let’s talk about constellations!”  
“Let’s talk about a certain someone who gave you a jacket. Just because looked damn good in you.” Rey replies with a maniac smile. “Payback is a bitch, my friend!”  
“That’s nothing to talk about this. He was kind. That’s all.”  
“Oh, I am kind! And I don’t give up my clothes to people to be kind!”  
“You don’t have sufficient clothes for yourself, Rey.”  
“You are going down, Finn.” 

“Why they did not edit their videos?”  
“I think they simply don’t wanna take the time. Or have it to make it properly.”  
“Or maybe they know that the teasing picks the interest of the people and they could use that to explain science... Just as you asked them to.”  
“You are a optimistic, Luke.”  
“And you have a really pretty future daughter-in-law.”  
Leia laughs.  
“You really need to see Han watching their videos, I swear he will propose to Rey in name of Ben. He keeps telling me ‘Leia, he needs her in his life. I need her in his life!’”  
“Maybe Han should. Heaven knows that your son are in dire need of advices about wooing a woman. That makes me think: How? He is Han Solo’s son after all!”  
“And you don’t remember how smooth Han was around me? Three words: He was not.”  
“But he likes to think he was.”  
“And that’s why none of your relationships lasted.” Leia sips her tea with a smug smile.  
“Oy! But, really, Leia, don’t you think that the growing attraction between your TA and your student can be prejudicial to both?”  
“Poe and I already talked about this: He knows that after the period ends he can do with any student what they both want and he thinks that’s for the best.”  
“And?”  
“I kind of - how the teens say now? - ship it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a scientist (Well, I have a degree in science), but I don't know much about astronomy. And I really don't know if you guys wanna read my sciency ramblings. That's it.


End file.
